is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize