after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
