WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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