I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize