that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize