U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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