PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
