I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
