Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
i will never coherently bang her
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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