just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
