I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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