can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
