Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
