At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
