As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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