Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
