chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
why does every cop we meet know your name?
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
