So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
