I puked a lego.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Randomize
