Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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