It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize