Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
there is glitter all over my balls
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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