It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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