Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
