Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize