he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
