if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I am full of burrito and curiosity
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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