Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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