Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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