im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
