I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
