don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Randomize