So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
