Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
