The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
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