if you like me you must not know who I am
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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