you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Even my vagina gasped.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
The air taste purple.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
