Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
