It's like a parade of train wrecks.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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