i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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