If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Randomize