She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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