ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Randomize
