So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
You smell like stripper and shame
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
He had one of those small greek statue penises
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Randomize
