i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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