i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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