I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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