He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
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