I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
