I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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