Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
