Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Randomize
